bradygirl_12 (bradygirl_12) wrote,

Fic: A Cat, A Bat, And A Reporter I: The Spotted Dick (2/2)

Title: A Cat, A Bat, And A Reporter I: The Spotted Dick (2/2)
Author: BradyGirl
Pairings/Characters (this chapter): Selina/Lois/Kathy, Benny/Ray V. (cameos from Due South)
Genres: Drama, Humor
Rating (this chapter): PG-13
Warnings: None
Spoilers: None
General Summary: Selina, Kathy, and Lois visit Toronto.
Chapter Summary: The ladies stroll around Toronto and find an interesting pub.
Date Of Completion: November 30, 2008
Date Of Posting: December 7, 2008
Disclaimer: I don’t own ‘em, DC and Alliance Atlantis do, more’s the pity.
Word Count: 913
Feedback welcome and appreciated.
Author’s Notes: Written for my LJ Second Anniversary Fic Request Meme for schnuffichen. Pairing: Selina/Lois/Kathy. Prompt: Toronto.
The entire series can be found here.




“The CN Tower is so Freudian,” Selina said as it came into view.

“Really?” Kathy smirked.

“I agree,” said Lois.

“Maybe you’re right.” Kathy shaded her eyes as she looked up at the tall spire jutting up into the sky.

“I’m always right, darling.”

Kathy and Lois smirked.

“So,” Lois put a hand on Selina’s shoulder, “How much evidence were you able to turn in against Big Tony?”

Selina’s smile was predatory. “Quite a bit.”

“Aren’t you a slinky kitty?”

“Look who’s talking? You played Little Miss Courier very nicely.”

Lois smiled smugly. “Yes, I did.”

Selina rolled her eyes while Kathy laughed.

They walked down the stairs to the brightly-lit subway. Kathy and Selina marveled at its cleanliness but Lois tut-tutted.

“Metropolis’ subways are comparable.”

“Lois, darling, I know that you live in the Shining City on the Hill compared to us benighted Gothamites, but this is exceptionally clean.” Selina touched a square pillar, not afraid of her hand coming away dirty.

“Keep telling yourself that, dear.”

“Now, now, pull in your claws, kitties. Our train’s coming.”

They boarded the car, exchanging smiles as a Mountie in dress reds came aboard.

Selina whispered, “Is it a requirement of the RCMP that all of them must be drop-dead gorgeous?”

Lois smirked. “It’s definitely in the bylaws.”

Kathy was more lesbian than bisexual, but even she had to admire the beautiful Mountie: blue eyes, thick, brown hair and an absolutely stunning physique that the dress uniform showed off to perfection.

At the next stop a slender Armani-clad man got on board carrying a bag of milk. His hair was shorn close to his skull and he moved with a panther-like grace. His most compelling feature were luminous emerald-green eyes.

“Hey, Benny,” he addressed the Mountie in a decidedly-American accent, “Why do you Canadians sell milk in bags?”

“I don’t know, Ray.”

“What?” The beautiful eyes widened. “You don’t know something?”

“I don’t know everything, Ray.” The tone was dry but affectionate.

“It isn’t natural.” Ray lifted the bag to indicate the milk.

“I hardly think milk in a bag is either natural or unnatural, Ray.”

“Canadians are weird, Benny.” Ray’s tone was affectionate, too.

“I prefer ‘unique’, Ray.”

Ray snorted and handed the bag to Benny.

At the next stop the Mountie and American got off, and Kathy, Lois, and Selina disembarked at the following stop, dissolving into gales of laughter.

“They are so married,” Lois gasped, wiping her eyes.

“Omigod, yes!” Selina leaned against a pillar, doubling over.

Kahty giggled. “So cute!”

The three women kept giggling as they walked down the street toward their hotel.

“Ah, now that’s what I need,” Selina said.

“What?” asked Lois.

“Some spotted dick.”

Kathy and Lois saw the sign The Spotted Dick over the pub across the street and laughed.

“Let’s go,” Lois said.

They crossed the street and entered the pub. It was busy but there was a table available in the corner. They walked past the bar and pool tables and sat down.

“Hmm, poutine,” Kathy said.

“No, no poutine.” Selina wrinkled her nose. “It’s just curds and whey, darling. Try the French fries with vinegar instead. Much better.”

Kathy considered.

“I want spotted dick!” Lois declared loudly, drowned out by the chatter and jukebox music.

“That’s currants in pudding, you know,” Kathy said.

“Sounds good to me.”

“What’ll you have, ladies?” asked their waitress after they had a chance to peruse the menu.

Kathy and Selina ordered club sandwiches and fries, Lois sticking with the pudding and a half-sandwich.

After the waitress left, Selina smirked, “I suppose there must be an obligatory Dick joke?”

“Why not?” Lois drank her water. “Who could tell us if Dick is spotted?”

“You mean besides Roy?” Kathy smirked.

“Well, in younger days, I’d say Babs.” Selina put her napkin on her lap.



Lois’ eyes gleamed. “Jimmy.”

“Really?” Selina raised an eyebrow.

“Wow!” Kathy exclaimed.

Selina giggled. “The boy has a thing for redheads.”

“With an ass like his, he can have his pick,” Kathy winked.

“Speaking of butts, Kory’s is outstanding.” Lois smiled.

“Among other things.” Selina lifted her glass of icewater to her lips, green eyes sparkling over the rim.

“Though I have to ‘butt in’ and say that Superman’s is out-of-this-world,” Lois added.

“Let’s not forget a Bat-butt,” Selina purred.

“How about Diana’s in that thong she wears?” Kathy drank her water.

“The woman is made of Amazonian proportions all over.” Selina’s foot gently rubbed against Kathy’s leg under the table.

“Bet she has fun with her blond squeeze.” Kathy carefully ignored Selina’s teasing.

“Must be fun squeezing her blond.”

“She does love a man in uniform.”

“Or out of it,” Lois smirked.

Their meals arrived and Lois dug into her pudding.

“Mmm, spotted dick is yummy.”

“That’s what Roy says.” Kathy dipped her French fry in the vinegar as her companions spluttered. She slid her tongue around the fry. “Mmm, a sting of flavor.”

“Maybe we should order some bangers,” Selina said.

“Honey, when we get back to the hotel, I’ll take care of that.” She leered. “Mash, too.”

The three lovers enjoyed salacious sauce with their sandwiches and spotted dick.


Author’s Notes (continued): During one of my trips attending RCW 139, a Due South convention in Toronto (Ray is a doll!), my friends and I indeed ate at a pub called The Spotted Dick and ate French fries with vinegar. ;)

A good time was had by all! ;)

Tags: a cat a bat and a reporter, benton fraser/ray vecchio, catwoman/lois lane/batwoman, due south, femslash, lj second anniversary fic request, selina kyle/lois lane/kathy kane

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic
    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.